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Haikus for Impressionable Kids
by Baysho

So you think
haikus can only be 5, 7, 5?
You're so dumb

A still pond
concrete shoes for Vinnie

Hiding under here
I can look up women's skirts
oooh, nice panties, hon

Tanning by the pool
fat man does a cannonball
you splashed me, asshole

The money shot comes
she laps it up dutifully
quite sore

Nothing to live for
might as well end it all now
oh wait, not yet... boom

Where's the cash you bitch
I don't care if you work all night
Smack!  Smack!

Now it is high noon
Any moment he will draw
Shit, forgot my gun

Damn these stock options
business bankrupt, they're worthless
Why'd I embezzle?

Amazing how much
pain one person could inflict
with one little match

Here doggy, come here
eat banana held near my crotch
good dog

Stop watching TV, kids
Don't you know it teaches violence
Get me my belt

A well-tended lawn
mowed a million times by an
overzealous man

What is the sound of one STD clapping?