Once upon a time there was a girl named Catherine Moss. Catherine was an attractive, waifish runway model: rich, successful and adored by millions. She was so thin that some said that on a bright day, if she was standing in front of the sun you could see her bones. Catherine had to carefully watch what she ate and worked out 5 times a day to maintain her fantastically trim but fit figure. But one thing Catherine could not give up was her love of chinese food. She especially loved chinese buffets, and this story begins at her favorite chinese buffet of all, the Dragon Garden Empress Palace.

Usually when she went to the Dragon Garden Empress Palace, Catherine would get a plate full of food, eat a bite from each dish, then leave the rest of her plate, contented. But today Catherine was feeling particularly mischevious and wanted to impress upon her newest lover, Eduardo, that she was indeed a miscreant like him and not a porcelain doll her father put up on the shelf at night.

"The great thing about buffets, Eduardo, is that you can get as much food as you want to get. Even if," she said with a wink, "You're not going to eat it." With that she got up from the table, Eduardo in tow, and proceeded to stock her tray with four plates heaped to capacity with white rice, chinese noodles, sweet and sour pork, and those little fried dumplings. She brought her tray to the table, gasping for breath, and as soon as she put down the tray she raced back and filled another tray with four plates of heaping portions of chinese food. One more trip and Catherine had before her twelve plates full of everything the buffet had to offer.

"Now watch this," Catherine said with a mischevious grin. She proceeded to eat one tiny litle nibble from each plate of food, then leaned back in her chair, patting her tiny stomach in satisfaction. "Hoo boy, I'm stuffed. You wanna go hit another buffet, Eduardo?" Catherine was sure that her little display of rebellion would stir Eduardo's loins into a sexual frenzy, and soon they would be bouncing away on her Italian leather sofa.

"Just where do you think you're going?" boomed a feminine but powerful voice from behind them as they got up to leave. It was The Dragon Lady, the mysterious but usually courteous owner of the restaurant. "This buffet is all you can eat, not all you can waste. We have endured months of your wastefulness, and the line is drawn here, grasshopper. Sit back down and finish it."

At this, Catherine started laughing. "What? Are you joking? There's no way I could finish all that food. Anyway, that stuff is cheap as dirt, you're probably making a profit anyway. I'll be on my way."

"Now is not the time to leave. Now is the time to eat." Catherine felt her shoulders almost jerked from their sockets as two waiters suddenly grabbed her by her arms and dragged her to the back of the restaurant. They strapped her to a table while two other waiters rolled in a giant, veiled contraption of some sort. She wondered where Eduardo had gone, hoping desperately that this was a joke he was playing on her or some sort of kinky sex thing.

It was not a kinky sex thing. The Dragon Lady pulled the veil off the device, revealing a giant mechanical bird. "This is an ancient Chinese secret, a torture device known as Mama Bird," she said as the waiters poured Catherine's twelve plates of food into the bird's tail-opening. "Mama Bird will feed you your meal, and you will appreciate it. Or else, you will die trying."

The Mama Bird was rolled over until its head hung over Catherine's mouth. Then, letting out a cold, robotic squak, its mouth tipped downward and opened slightly, and it started feeding her as a mother bird does for its nest. Catherine felt small bites of General Tso's Chicken fall into her mouth, and tried to spit it out, only to find the robotic beak bopping it back in. "Chew or Lose!" said The Dragon Lady. "You must eat, or you must die. Choose, waif!"

And so Catherine began to chew. When she let go and accepted her cruel culinary fate, it became a pleasure she had never before experienced. She would have never dreamed letting herself indulge in such mass quantity scarfing, but in this position she had no choice, and so she surrendered herself to it. Bits of egg roll, fried rice, lo mien, beef with broccoli, and even crab rangoon were scarfed down with zest. Even when her tiny stomach was full to bursting she continued to scarf, experiencing a release she hadn't felt since her dog licked her funny back in grade school.

The following week, Catherine came back to The Dragon Garden Empress Palace. She had since then rounded out some, her waifish figure replaced by curvy hips, plump cheeks, a growing belly, and recognizable breasts. "Thank you, Dragon Lady! You changed my life! Although it was a pretty fucked-up way to prove it to me, I've realized that eating mass quantities of food is far more important than my career as a supermodel! I'll never go hungry again."

"You're welcome," said The Dragon Lady with a courteous smile. "Help yourself."

"Oh, I will. I'll be having twelve plates, I guarantee you. I've got a date with Mama Bird for tonight." And as would happen every night from now on, her mouth began to water uncontrollably.

THE END.
 
 
 
 

 I got your egg roll right here