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I am a Master Baiter
by Phil

When it's springtime and the lake out behind my house starts to come to life again, I go out on my little boat and prepare to spend some quality time out there on the lake with nothing but me and my rod.  I'll bring everything I need:  my pole, my floating balls, my tool kit, and most of all, my master bait.  Then I'll spend hours, just floating out there on Lake Titicaca, holding my rod and dreaming dreams.

I am a master baiter.  I am the best there is.  I know exactly how to do it, and when I go out on the lake, I'm going to be shooting the breeze and coming home with a full load.  The trick is to prepare the stuff beforehand.  I've got my own special kit that I use to do it.  That's why I call the stuff "master bait:"  I don't know anybody with a better kit than I have.

After my rod is ready to go, I'll whip it out, sink my balls into the water, and start reeling it in, tugging at it just a little.  I'll just slowly crank on it and pull slowly, over and over.  Then when I feel a little tug, I'll start cranking that pole until I've hauled in the big one.  Hoo-weee!  It's exciting.

It's a great feeling being out there alone on the lake, just me and my pole.  I feel a sort of kinship with my pole, really.  It's man against the elements out there, you don't have anyone to help you out, you have to do it all by yourself.  And it reminds me of how much a part of nature I am when I'm out there, catching and releasing, catching and releasing.

And then when I get home after a long day of fishing, I jack off.  Man, what a life!

That was quite enough of that, index